From 84631bdfb55cc1d3dd6aefe367376561f0ca15d2 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: betalars Date: Tue, 29 Jul 2025 00:03:46 +0200 Subject: [PATCH] import story texts --- .../volunteer_room/scenes/autism.tscn | 580 +++++++++++++++++ .../volunteer_room/scenes/burnout.tscn | 580 +++++++++++++++++ .../scenes/eating_challenges.tscn | 580 +++++++++++++++++ .../volunteer_room/scenes/self_advocacy.tscn | 580 +++++++++++++++++ .../scenes/terhapy_volunteer.tscn | 580 +++++++++++++++++ .../volunteer_room/scenes/therapy_uni.tscn | 581 ++++++++++++++++++ .../volunteer_room/scenes/trans.tscn | 580 +++++++++++++++++ .../volunteer_room/scenes/trauma.tscn | 581 ++++++++++++++++++ src/export_presets.cfg | 12 +- src/internationalisation.csv | 109 ++++ src/internationalisation.de.translation | Bin 23997 -> 33809 bytes src/internationalisation.en.translation | Bin 21022 -> 29330 bytes src/internationalisation.es.translation | Bin 9969 -> 13781 bytes src/internationalisation.ja.translation | Bin 9969 -> 13781 bytes src/internationalisation.notes.translation | Bin 10496 -> 14312 bytes .../collectable/new_collectable_ui.gd | 2 +- .../collectable/new_collectable_ui.tscn | 6 +- 17 files changed, 4762 insertions(+), 9 deletions(-) create mode 100644 src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/autism.tscn create mode 100644 src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/burnout.tscn create mode 100644 src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/eating_challenges.tscn create mode 100644 src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/self_advocacy.tscn create mode 100644 src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/terhapy_volunteer.tscn create mode 100644 src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/therapy_uni.tscn create mode 100644 src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/trans.tscn create mode 100644 src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/trauma.tscn diff --git a/src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/autism.tscn b/src/base-environments/volunteer_room/scenes/autism.tscn new file mode 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What I know is: I have never been so mad at my brother... it's not like I don't love him. It's not like I didn't like to care for him, when he came home with a meltdown. I cared a lot for him. My parents cared a lot for him, everybody cared a lot for him. He always had it sooo difficult because of his autism. As if I wasn't bullied too. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]Anyway … I don’t know why he needed to tell me about his almost first time on that christmas eve. I was immedieately stressed because usually that means he needs comfort but in hindsight I think he meant to tell something wholesome? [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]He told me about wanting \"it\" to happen so badly that he was increadibly relieved when his girlfriend just wanted to play videogames instead. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]And it just hit me like a train. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I just unloaded everything on him: How I got treated, how he never gave me comfort, how much I had to care for him and how scared I was … every time I recognized myself trough him. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]He just sat there in disbelief until I lost my words. I wanted to stare him into understanding, I wanted him to be mad, but he just sat there. He didn't look me in the eye - and then just took his phone, and wrote on it. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]\"Sorry\" my phone rang \"I never knew what to say. Can I write instead?\" That look on his face, I... I didn't want to be angry anymore. I needed to be sad. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]So I curled next to him and wrote back. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]He'd never made me feel seen before. But with how much he wrote to me about ADHD and Autism that evening, it felt like he understood me better than I myself did. 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And working as a teacher brings me so much joy.", "The kids love me. My colleagues admire me.", "spending nights and weekends to prepare for my lessons so the quick witted kids are challenged and the other kids don\'t feel left behind.", "I know the good I do for them.", "But I just keep falling behind.", "It\'s bad enough to try to reach parents that just won\'t show interest in their wonderful kids. But at least I can do the right thing for these kids.", "But dealing with parents that insist every flaw their child has is my mistake? I just can\'t!", "And I am more and more afraid of making mistakes.", "I mean if all the usually good kids have worse grades in my class am I actually doing something wrong with how I teach?", "Maybe I shouldn\'t have them do so many projects and do more tests like everybody else.", "If only I could bring myself to start grading...", "I get more and more irritated. 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I've gotten through Uni in time. And working as a teacher brings me so much joy. The kids love me. My colleagues admire me. spending nights and weekends to prepare for my lessons so the quick witted kids are challenged and the other kids don't feel left behind. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I know the good I do for them. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]But I just keep falling behind. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]It's bad enough to try to reach parents that just won't show interest in their wonderful kids. But at least I can do the right thing for these kids. But dealing with parents that insist every flaw their child has is my mistake? I just can't! [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]And I am more and more afraid of making mistakes. I mean if all the usually good kids have worse grades in my class am I actually doing something wrong with how I teach? Maybe I shouldn't have them do so many projects and do more tests like everybody else. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]If only I could bring myself to start grading... I get more and more irritated. And the classroom noise that once brought joy is starting to give me anxiety. I can't even bring myself to reply to Jules anymore because I know I'm losing weight again and I can't have her be worried about me. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]She deserves to see the best version of myself. So do the kids. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]And I know all of this will get better if I just pull myself together. Just breathe and work. I have chosen the right path through life. I must be okay. 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The dishes, the laundry, the trash, the groceries, the food.", "But guess what: when you are at university, they don\'t provide a mom with your dorm.", "And suddenly, you don\'t just need to study for your first semester, you need to learn to survive on your own. Good luck building good habits with that.", "I got really thin.", "I didn\'t really manage to eat at home, I didn\'t have the money to eat takeout all the time and oh my god:", "how do students manage to survive in a cafeteria?", "I mean: How do they manage to socialise, attend all the lectures, find relationships and even look passable with all that going on?", "Is it just me? I don\'t know.", "Who I am glad about tho is Jules. 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The dishes, the laundry, the trash, the groceries, the food. But guess what: when you are at university, they don't provide a mom with your dorm. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]And suddenly, you don't just need to study for your first semester, you need to learn to survive on your own. Good luck building good habits with that. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I got really thin. I didn't really manage to eat at home, I didn't have the money to eat takeout all the time and oh my god: how do students manage to survive in a cafeteria? I mean: How do they manage to socialise, attend all the lectures, find relationships and even look passable with all that going on? [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]Is it just me? I don't know. Who I am glad about tho is Jules. She has an eating order history and someday had enough of seeing my body crumble and decieded to basically adopt me. 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I mean I wish at least some of my teachers had known a thing or two when I grew up.", "But the lecture I had? Phew!", "ADHD was one big issue:", "Having difficulties completing tasks that are not rewarding or urgent, having trouble in dealing with emotions, being forgetful, being unable to make or follow through with plans, chronic unrest...", "I never really managed to grasp the concept because I couldn\'t tell the difference to myself!", "And the looks I got when I asked back.", "Did they think I had ADHD? Did my teachers think that? Did Mr. Thomas lie when he said I was gifted? I ...", "thinking about that just makes me mad.", "But it is so much worse with Autism. A disorder for boys that show no interest in other children and will neither look you in the eye nor understand your authority.", "My brother is probably one of the most caring people I know!", "He just needs trust to open up. So give him time and you will wish more kids had his sense of authority.", "He would never talk behind your back or lie to you. And he\'d lie if he pretended to respect authority that had not been earned.", "And he\'d lie if he pretended to respect authority that had not been earned.") +paragraph_lengths = PackedInt32Array(1, 4, 5, 7, 9, 10, 12) +progress = -1.0 + +[node name="PanelContainer" type="PanelContainer" parent="."] +layout_mode = 2 +mouse_filter = 1 + +[node name="StartFrame" type="TextureRect" parent="PanelContainer"] +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(900, 900) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_vertical = 0 +texture = ExtResource("2_gfeis") +expand_mode = 2 +stretch_mode = 4 + +[node name="Panel" type="PanelContainer" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame"] +show_behind_parent = true +layout_mode = 1 +anchors_preset = 8 +anchor_left = 0.5 +anchor_top = 0.5 +anchor_right = 0.5 +anchor_bottom = 0.5 +offset_left = -450.0 +offset_top = -450.0 +offset_right = 450.0 +offset_bottom = 450.0 +grow_horizontal = 2 +grow_vertical = 2 +rotation = 0.349066 +pivot_offset = Vector2(450, 450) +mouse_filter = 1 + +[node name="TextureRect" type="TextureRect" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame"] +layout_mode = 1 +anchors_preset = 6 +anchor_left = 1.0 +anchor_top = 0.5 +anchor_right = 1.0 +anchor_bottom = 0.5 +offset_left = 117.0 +offset_top = -320.0 +offset_right = 1141.0 +offset_bottom = 1216.0 +grow_horizontal = 0 +grow_vertical = 2 +scale = Vector2(0.5, 0.5) +texture = SubResource("ViewportTexture_ho85h") + +[node name="SubViewport" type="SubViewport" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame/TextureRect"] +own_world_3d = true +world_3d = SubResource("World3D_4m36g") +transparent_bg = true +msaa_3d = 1 +canvas_cull_mask = 4293918724 +size = Vector2i(1024, 1536) +render_target_update_mode = 3 + +[node name="VBoxContainer" type="VBoxContainer" parent="PanelContainer"] +layout_mode = 2 + +[node name="Label" type="Label" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer"] +layout_mode = 2 +theme_type_variation = &"HeaderLarge" +text = "Science Poster" + +[node name="StoryScroll" type="ScrollContainer" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer"] +unique_name_in_owner = true +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(0, 700) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_horizontal = 4 +size_flags_vertical = 2 +mouse_filter = 2 +horizontal_scroll_mode = 0 +vertical_scroll_mode = 3 + +[node name="StoryLabel" type="RichTextLabel" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer/StoryScroll"] +unique_name_in_owner = true +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(800, 10) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_horizontal = 3 +bbcode_enabled = true +text = "[p]I want to like that mental health is being taught during teacher training now. I mean I wish at least some of my teachers had known a thing or two when I grew up. But the lecture I had? Phew! [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]ADHD was one big issue: Having difficulties completing tasks that are not rewarding or urgent, having trouble in dealing with emotions, being forgetful, being unable to make or follow through with plans, chronic unrest... I never really managed to grasp the concept because I couldn't tell the difference to myself! [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]And the looks I got when I asked back. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]Did they think I had ADHD? Did my teachers think that? Did Mr. Thomas lie when he said I was gifted? I ... thinking about that just makes me mad. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]But it is so much worse with Autism. A disorder for boys that show no interest in other children and will neither look you in the eye nor understand your authority. My brother is probably one of the most caring people I know! [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]He just needs trust to open up. So give him time and you will wish more kids had his sense of authority. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]He would never talk behind your back or lie to you. And he'd lie if he pretended to respect authority that had not been earned. And he'd lie if he pretended to respect authority that had not been earned. 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mean it has made me go to therapy and that was a good thing.", "My therapist was pretty young and still in training.", "Talking to *him* about sex never really worked for me.", "So I still don\'t know what to do about my cravings. I\'d rather not have them but I can\'t deny they exist.", "At least he gave me the tools to figure it out on my own.", "Old thoughts are here to stay, he always said. But you can choose how to react.", "And while I choose to not react to my cravings for now, I can choose something different in the future.", "He also helped me manage the gauntlet that is an ADHD diagnosis. I suspect I wouldn\'t have the executive skills to get that on my own.", "So I guess I got my medication thanks to Lukas?", "And I can tell when to brace for my period because the weird urge to make my ex hit some very hard ground is quite specific.") +paragraph_lengths = PackedInt32Array(2, 3, 4, 5, 8, 11, 12, 14) +progress = -1.0 + +[node name="PanelContainer" type="PanelContainer" parent="."] +layout_mode = 2 +mouse_filter = 1 + +[node name="StartFrame" type="TextureRect" parent="PanelContainer"] +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(900, 900) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_vertical = 0 +texture = ExtResource("2_00crh") +expand_mode = 2 +stretch_mode = 4 + +[node name="Panel" type="PanelContainer" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame"] +show_behind_parent = true +layout_mode = 1 +anchors_preset = 8 +anchor_left = 0.5 +anchor_top = 0.5 +anchor_right = 0.5 +anchor_bottom = 0.5 +offset_left = -450.0 +offset_top = -450.0 +offset_right = 450.0 +offset_bottom = 450.0 +grow_horizontal = 2 +grow_vertical = 2 +rotation = 0.349066 +pivot_offset = Vector2(450, 450) +mouse_filter = 1 + +[node name="TextureRect" type="TextureRect" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame"] +layout_mode = 1 +anchors_preset = 6 +anchor_left = 1.0 +anchor_top = 0.5 +anchor_right = 1.0 +anchor_bottom = 0.5 +offset_left = 117.0 +offset_top = -320.0 +offset_right = 1141.0 +offset_bottom = 1216.0 +grow_horizontal = 0 +grow_vertical = 2 +scale = Vector2(0.5, 0.5) +texture = SubResource("ViewportTexture_ho85h") + +[node name="SubViewport" type="SubViewport" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame/TextureRect"] +own_world_3d = true +world_3d = SubResource("World3D_4m36g") +transparent_bg = true +msaa_3d = 1 +canvas_cull_mask = 4293918724 +size = Vector2i(1024, 1536) +render_target_update_mode = 3 + +[node name="VBoxContainer" type="VBoxContainer" parent="PanelContainer"] +layout_mode = 2 + +[node name="Label" type="Label" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer"] +layout_mode = 2 +theme_type_variation = &"HeaderLarge" +text = "Doctors Note" + +[node name="StoryScroll" type="ScrollContainer" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer"] +unique_name_in_owner = true +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(0, 700) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_horizontal = 4 +size_flags_vertical = 2 +mouse_filter = 2 +horizontal_scroll_mode = 0 +vertical_scroll_mode = 3 + +[node name="StoryLabel" type="RichTextLabel" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer/StoryScroll"] +unique_name_in_owner = true +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(800, 10) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_horizontal = 3 +bbcode_enabled = true +text = "[p]I sometimes wish I could go back in time to save myself from Lukas. Sometimes I even want to fight him one last time to make him feel how much he hurt me. I don't like these thoughts, because all they do is make my head spiral into an endless void of anger and doubt. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]So on a calm mind, I just hope he learned his lesson so his next love doesn't need to become a survivor. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]But do I regret being one? [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I mean it has made me go to therapy and that was a good thing. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]My therapist was pretty young and still in training. Talking to *him* about sex never really worked for me. So I still don't know what to do about my cravings. I'd rather not have them but I can't deny they exist. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]At least he gave me the tools to figure it out on my own. Old thoughts are here to stay, he always said. But you can choose how to react. And while I choose to not react to my cravings for now, I can choose something different in the future. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]He also helped me manage the gauntlet that is an ADHD diagnosis. I suspect I wouldn't have the executive skills to get that on my own. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]So I guess I got my medication thanks to Lukas? And I can tell when to brace for my period because the weird urge to make my ex hit some very hard ground is quite specific. 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Sorry prof, I wanted to come but there was no class for me. ", "I didn\'t sign up to study math, biology and art history. I came here to study education.", "And my dear Mr. Professor:", "seeing your lacklustre lectures, I don\'t think there\'s much I can learn from you.", "So, rather than wasting my time on advanced algebra, I spend it on the student council to organize support I would have needed but didn\'t get.", "I have never worked or learned so much in my entire life.", "This is also where I got diagnosed by peer review.", "Who would have guessed that creating a social activity without alcohol or noise would attract all the neurodivergent students.", "This is also why I would maybe still do it all over again:", "Because these beautiful people very probably saved my life by not giving up on me and helping me get professional help.", "My therapist was somewhat old-fashioned and I got to learn from experience why deep psychology isn\'t recommended for autism or ADHD,", "but she didn\'t think I had that anyway.", "So we talked a lot about my depression, my sense of self and how it evolved from my past.", "She was a very good listener and had a gift for putting her finger on hurtful thoughts.", "She was never gentle in doing that, but she was right about one thing:", "Old thoughts are here to stay, but they can be rearranged.") +paragraph_lengths = PackedInt32Array(0, 2, 5, 7, 9, 11, 14, 17) +progress = -1.0 + +[node name="PanelContainer" type="PanelContainer" parent="."] +layout_mode = 2 +mouse_filter = 1 + +[node name="StartFrame" type="TextureRect" parent="PanelContainer"] +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(900, 900) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_vertical = 0 +texture = ExtResource("2_27dlw") +expand_mode = 2 +stretch_mode = 4 + +[node name="Panel" type="PanelContainer" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame"] +show_behind_parent = true +layout_mode = 1 +anchors_preset = 8 +anchor_left = 0.5 +anchor_top = 0.5 +anchor_right = 0.5 +anchor_bottom = 0.5 +offset_left = -450.0 +offset_top = -450.0 +offset_right = 450.0 +offset_bottom = 450.0 +grow_horizontal = 2 +grow_vertical = 2 +rotation = 0.349066 +pivot_offset = Vector2(450, 450) +mouse_filter = 1 + +[node name="TextureRect" type="TextureRect" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame"] +layout_mode = 1 +anchors_preset = 6 +anchor_left = 1.0 +anchor_top = 0.5 +anchor_right = 1.0 +anchor_bottom = 0.5 +offset_left = 117.0 +offset_top = -320.0 +offset_right = 1141.0 +offset_bottom = 1216.0 +grow_horizontal = 0 +grow_vertical = 2 +scale = Vector2(0.5, 0.5) +texture = SubResource("ViewportTexture_ho85h") + +[node name="SubViewport" type="SubViewport" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame/TextureRect"] +own_world_3d = true +world_3d = SubResource("World3D_4m36g") +transparent_bg = true +msaa_3d = 1 +canvas_cull_mask = 4293918724 +size = Vector2i(1024, 1536) +render_target_update_mode = 3 + +[node name="VBoxContainer" type="VBoxContainer" parent="PanelContainer"] +layout_mode = 2 + +[node name="Label" type="Label" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer"] +layout_mode = 2 +theme_type_variation = &"HeaderLarge" +text = "Doctors Note" + +[node name="StoryScroll" type="ScrollContainer" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer"] +unique_name_in_owner = true +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(0, 700) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_horizontal = 4 +size_flags_vertical = 2 +mouse_filter = 2 +scroll_vertical = 111 +horizontal_scroll_mode = 0 +vertical_scroll_mode = 3 + +[node name="StoryLabel" type="RichTextLabel" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer/StoryScroll"] +unique_name_in_owner = true +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(800, 10) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_horizontal = 3 +bbcode_enabled = true +text = "[p]In hindsight I don't know if going to uni was the right decision. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I doubt many professors would recommend me to come again. Me, the lazy student that just lacks the discipline to come to their lectures and do their assignments and learn for their exams. Sorry prof, I wanted to come but there was no class for me. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I didn't sign up to study math, biology and art history. I came here to study education. And my dear Mr. Professor: seeing your lacklustre lectures, I don't think there's much I can learn from you. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]So, rather than wasting my time on advanced algebra, I spend it on the student council to organize support I would have needed but didn't get. I have never worked or learned so much in my entire life. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]This is also where I got diagnosed by peer review. Who would have guessed that creating a social activity without alcohol or noise would attract all the neurodivergent students. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]This is also why I would maybe still do it all over again: Because these beautiful people very probably saved my life by not giving up on me and helping me get professional help. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]My therapist was somewhat old-fashioned and I got to learn from experience why deep psychology isn't recommended for autism or ADHD, but she didn't think I had that anyway. So we talked a lot about my depression, my sense of self and how it evolved from my past. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]She was a very good listener and had a gift for putting her finger on hurtful thoughts. She was never gentle in doing that, but she was right about one thing: Old thoughts are here to stay, but they can be rearranged. 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I had no clue what I was doing.", "Good thing Markus has been DMing for longer than I live, so he helped me with all the rules and bits and bobs.", "He said I could be anything - as long as it was a tank. After seeing my Twokinds poster, he first suggested me making a druid, but he also mentioned the Barbarian ...", "and approaching problems head-first and tearing everything apart while raging ... was just a mood I could get behind.", "But then came *that* question:", "\"Do you want to be a Boy-barian or a Girl-barian?\"", "And that inner turmoil about boys and girls and ... fuck! I can\'t deal with this so I just shrugged it off.", "\"Okay, then roll for Gender!\". He put a d20 in a cup and gave it to me. \"Even for girl, odd for boy and floor is complicated.\", he laughed.", "I didn\'t appreciate that: \"It\'s in a cup, how is it supposed to hit the floor?\"", "His tone was still friendly, but suddenly more serious.", "\"I was meaning to ask what result you\'d be hoping for so you need to roll blind. But you may also just throw that die at your DM and see what happens.\"", "I threw that die at my DM.", "\"So, floor it is?\"", "I ... I couldn\'t be mad at that.", "When he then asked me for my name, I just spat out \"Xavier\".", "\"Okay, Xavier. And how do we want to name your Barbarian?\" I ... also couldn\'t be mad at that.", "Eventually, we settled on Ruby:", "a bearded dwarven women with a strong attitude that - unlike most other dwarves - for some reason really doesn\'t mind being mistaken for a man.", "And weirdly ... that was the first \"female\" character I enjoyed playing.", "Even tho I really didn\'t want that die to land on girl.") +paragraph_lengths = PackedInt32Array(0, 3, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12, 13, 14, 15, 17, 19, 21) +progress = -1.0 + +[node name="PanelContainer" type="PanelContainer" parent="."] +layout_mode = 2 +mouse_filter = 1 + +[node name="StartFrame" type="TextureRect" parent="PanelContainer"] +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(900, 900) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_vertical = 0 +texture = ExtResource("2_fe2un") +expand_mode = 2 +stretch_mode = 4 + +[node name="Panel" type="PanelContainer" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame"] +show_behind_parent = true +layout_mode = 1 +anchors_preset = 8 +anchor_left = 0.5 +anchor_top = 0.5 +anchor_right = 0.5 +anchor_bottom = 0.5 +offset_left = -450.0 +offset_top = -450.0 +offset_right = 450.0 +offset_bottom = 450.0 +grow_horizontal = 2 +grow_vertical = 2 +rotation = 0.349066 +pivot_offset = Vector2(450, 450) +mouse_filter = 1 + +[node name="TextureRect" type="TextureRect" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame"] +layout_mode = 1 +anchors_preset = 6 +anchor_left = 1.0 +anchor_top = 0.5 +anchor_right = 1.0 +anchor_bottom = 0.5 +offset_left = 117.0 +offset_top = -320.0 +offset_right = 1141.0 +offset_bottom = 1216.0 +grow_horizontal = 0 +grow_vertical = 2 +scale = Vector2(0.5, 0.5) +texture = SubResource("ViewportTexture_ho85h") + +[node name="SubViewport" type="SubViewport" parent="PanelContainer/StartFrame/TextureRect"] +own_world_3d = true +world_3d = SubResource("World3D_4m36g") +transparent_bg = true +msaa_3d = 1 +canvas_cull_mask = 4293918724 +size = Vector2i(1024, 1536) +render_target_update_mode = 3 + +[node name="VBoxContainer" type="VBoxContainer" parent="PanelContainer"] +layout_mode = 2 + +[node name="Label" type="Label" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer"] +layout_mode = 2 +theme_type_variation = &"HeaderLarge" +text = "Colorful Dice" + +[node name="StoryScroll" type="ScrollContainer" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer"] +unique_name_in_owner = true +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(0, 700) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_horizontal = 4 +size_flags_vertical = 2 +mouse_filter = 2 +horizontal_scroll_mode = 0 +vertical_scroll_mode = 3 + +[node name="StoryLabel" type="RichTextLabel" parent="PanelContainer/VBoxContainer/StoryScroll"] +unique_name_in_owner = true +custom_minimum_size = Vector2(800, 10) +layout_mode = 2 +size_flags_horizontal = 3 +bbcode_enabled = true +text = "[p]Ahw, shiny math rocks! [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]It's funny how small moments can put your whole world upside down. It was the first time I ever made a DnD Character. I had no clue what I was doing. Good thing Markus has been DMing for longer than I live, so he helped me with all the rules and bits and bobs. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]He said I could be anything - as long as it was a tank. After seeing my Twokinds poster, he first suggested me making a druid, but he also mentioned the Barbarian ... and approaching problems head-first and tearing everything apart while raging ... was just a mood I could get behind. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]But then came *that* question: \"Do you want to be a Boy-barian or a Girl-barian?\" [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]And that inner turmoil about boys and girls and ... fuck! I can't deal with this so I just shrugged it off. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]\"Okay, then roll for Gender!\". He put a d20 in a cup and gave it to me. \"Even for girl, odd for boy and floor is complicated.\", he laughed. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I didn't appreciate that: \"It's in a cup, how is it supposed to hit the floor?\" [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]His tone was still friendly, but suddenly more serious. \"I was meaning to ask what result you'd be hoping for so you need to roll blind. But you may also just throw that die at your DM and see what happens.\" [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I threw that die at my DM. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]\"So, floor it is?\" [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I ... I couldn't be mad at that. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]When he then asked me for my name, I just spat out \"Xavier\". \"Okay, Xavier. And how do we want to name your Barbarian?\" I ... also couldn't be mad at that. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]Eventually, we settled on Ruby: a bearded dwarven women with a strong attitude that - unlike most other dwarves - for some reason really doesn't mind being mistaken for a man. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]And weirdly ... that was the first \"female\" character I enjoyed playing. Even tho I really didn't want that die to land on girl. 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It taught me the value of failing and feedback. It taught me how difficult school was for teachers too. And it taught me how messed up my school was because for the first time I've met a peer group that made me feel welcome from the day we met. When I told them about being single, they were genuinely surprised. I was lovable to them and that was just a huge relief for me at the time. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]But the best thing about these seminar weeks was that old oven they had at the hostel. It was an old farmhouse with wooden beams everywhere and a nice warm nuck above the cob fireplace. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]One evening, Alex and Deanah went up with me to be cozy and talk. I told them about my comic stash, we cuddled, we cobbled when suddenly, Lukas sat on top of me, again. A pearl of sweat dropped from his nose onto my throat again. He started undoing his shirt again. I was starting to drift away, when Deanah shook me. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I was so scared. They were so worried. They asked so many questions, about what just happend, so I told them how I messed up with Lukas and Deanah just tried to talk me into believing I got raped. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I just ran away. It felt like everything was my fault. What if Lukas learned what I just said? I saw a playground and just started hitting this stupid wiggle clown. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I didn't really notice how one of the adults came and sat near me on a swing. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]I eventually joined them. We talked a lot about the stars that night. How we alone can give meaning to the whole universe, because we gave it the ability to understand itself. To see its beauty. It helped a lot. [/p][p][font_size=8] [/font_size][/p][p]In our next seminar week, there was a workshop about consent. I was unsure at first, but signed up for it nonetheless. This is where I understood that Lukas never asked me, that I froze because he jumped me, and that I am not alone. It still took me some time to fully accept, that I was not to blame. 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wie sehr er mir weh getan hat.",,, p_lessons_learned,on a calm mind I just hope they learned their lesson.,"eigentlich hoffe ich, dass der gleiche Fehler nicht nochmal passiert.",,, p_thought_spiral,"whenever I focus on that, my thoughts spiral down.",darüber nachdenken bringt mich in ein schwarzes Loch.,,, +I don't know if this was the best or the worst Christmas I remember.,I don't know if this was the best or the worst Christmas I remember.,"Ich weiß nicht, ob es das beste oder schlimmste Weihnachten aller Zeiten war.",,, +What I know is: I have never been so mad at my brother...,What I know is: I have never been so mad at my brother...,"Ich weiß nur, dass ich noch nie so wütend auf meinen Bruder war.",,, +"it's not like I don't love him. It's not like I didn't like to care for him, when he came home with a meltdown.","it's not like I don't love him. It's not like I didn't like to care for him, when he came home with a meltdown.","Es ist ja nicht so, als ob ich ihn nicht liebe. Als ob ich mich nicht immer um ihn gekümmert hätte, als er mit einem Meltdown nach hause kam.",,, +"I cared a lot for him. My parents cared a lot for him, everybody cared a lot for him.","I cared a lot for him. My parents cared a lot for him, everybody cared a lot for him.","ch habe mich immer gekümmert. Meine Eltern haben sich immer gekümmert, alle haben sich immer gekümmert.",,, +He always had it sooo difficult because of his autism. As if I wasn't bullied too.,He always had it sooo difficult because of his autism. As if I wasn't bullied too.,Er hat es ja so schwer gehabt mit seinem Autismus. Als ob ich nicht auch immer das Opfer war.,,, +Anyway … I don’t know why he needed to tell me about his almost first time on christmas eve.,Anyway … I don’t know why he needed to tell me about his almost first time on christmas eve.,"Jedensalls … ich weiß nicht, warum er mir unbedingt Heiligabend von seinem beinahe ersten Mal erzählen musste.",,, +I was immedieately stressed because usually that means he needs comfort but in hindsight I think he meant to tell something holesome?,I was immedieately stressed because usually that means he needs comfort but in hindsight I think he meant to tell something holesome?,"Ich war sofort gestresst, weil ich ihn normalerweise immer trösten muss und inzwischen glaube ich wollte er mir eigentlich was nettes erzählen.",,, +Because he just pressured himself so much into wanting it to happen that he was increadibly releaved when his girlfriend just wanted to play videogames instead.,Because he just pressured himself so much into wanting it to happen that he was increadibly releaved when his girlfriend just wanted to play videogames instead.,"Weil er hatte sich richtig viel Druck gemacht, dass es endlich passiert und war dann unendlich froh darüber, dass seine Freundin einfach “nein” gesagt hat und lieber was zocken wollte.",,, +And it just hit me like a train.,And it just hit me like a train.,Und es hat mich einfach fertig gemacht.,,, +I just unloaded everything on him:,I just unloaded everything on him:,Also habe ich einfach alles raus gelassen:,,, +"How I got treated, how he never gave me comfort, how much I had to care for him and how scared I was …","How I got treated, how he never gave me comfort, how much I had to care for him and how scared I was …","Wie ich behandelt wurde, wie er mich nie getröstet hat, wie ich mich immer kümmern musste und, wie viel Angst ich hatte …",,, +every time I recognized myself trough him.,every time I recognized myself trough him.,"immer, wenn ich mich in ihm gesehen habe.",,, +He just sat there in disbelief until I lost my words.,He just sat there in disbelief until I lost my words.,"Er hat einfach nur da gesessen und mich angestarrt, bis ich keine Worte mehr hatte.",,, +"I wanted to stare him into understanding, I wanted him to be mad, but he just sat there. He didn't look me in the eye - and then just took his phone, and wrote on it.","I wanted to stare him into understanding, I wanted him to be mad, but he just sat there. He didn't look me in the eye - and then just took his phone, and wrote on it.","Also habe ich versucht zurück zu starren, bis er mich versteht, aber er ist einfach nur da gesessen. Und ohne mir in die Augen zu sehen hat er sein Handy genommen.",,, +"""Sorry""","""Sorry""",“Sorry”,,, +"my phone rang ""I never knew what to say. Can I write instead?""","my phone rang ""I never knew what to say. Can I write instead?""","mein Handy klingelte “Ich wusste nie, was ich sagen sollte. Kann ich dir schreiben?”",,, +"That look on his face, I... I didn't want to be angry anymore. I needed to be sad.","That look on his face, I... I didn't want to be angry anymore. I needed to be sad.","Wie er mich ansah, ich … konnte einfach nicht mehr wütend - ich musste traurig sein,",,, +So I curled next to him and wrote back.,So I curled next to him and wrote back.,also habe ich mich mit dem Rücken zu ihm zusammen gerollt und zurück geschrieben.,,, +"He'd never made me feel seen before. But with how much he wrote to me about ADHD and Autism that evening,","He'd never made me feel seen before. But with how much he wrote to me about ADHD and Autism that evening,","Ich hatte nie das Gefühl gehabt, dass er mich groß beachten würde. Aber vielleicht mit all dem, was er mir über Autismus und ADHS geschrieben hat,",,, +it felt like he understood me better than I myself did.,it felt like he understood me better than I myself did.,"verstand er mich doch besser, als ich mich selbst.",,, +Colorful Dice,Colorful Dice,Colorful Dice,,, +"Ahw, shiny math rocks!","Ahw, shiny math rocks!",Aaah! Die heiligen Steine der Entropie!,,, +It's funny how small moments can put your whole world upside down.,It's funny how small moments can put your whole world upside down.,Wie kleine Momente einem das Leben auf den Kopf stellen können.,,, +It was the first time I ever made a DnD Character. I had no clue what I was doing.,It was the first time I ever made a DnD Character. I had no clue what I was doing.,"Ich hatte wirklich null Plan, als ich meinen ersten DnD Charakter bauen wollte.",,, +"Good thing Markus has been DMing for longer than I live, so he helped me with all the rules and bits and bobs.","Good thing Markus has been DMing for longer than I live, so he helped me with all the rules and bits and bobs.","Aber zum Glück ist Markus einfach länger Spielleiter, as ich lebe. Bei all den Regeln und Entscheidungen war das ultra hilfreich.",,, +"He said I could be anything - as long as it was a tank. After seeing my Twokinds poster, he first suggested me making a druid, but he also mentioned the Barbarian ...","He said I could be anything - as long as it was a tank. After seeing my Twokinds poster, he first suggested me making a druid, but he also mentioned the Barbarian ...","Er sagte ich könnte alles sein! So lange es nicht umfällt, wenn man drauf haut. Wegen meinem Twokinds Poster hat er vorgeschlagen ich könnte doch Druide spielen, aber dann hat er auch den Barbaren erwähnt.",,, +and approaching problems head-first and tearing everything apart while raging ... was just a mood I could get behind.,and approaching problems head-first and tearing everything apart while raging ... was just a mood I could get behind.,Und einfach mit dem Kopf durch die Wand Probleme in einem Rausch von Wut zerprügeln? Das fühl ich schon sehr.,,, +But then came *that* question:,But then came *that* question:,Aber dann diese Frage:,,, +"""Do you want to be a Boy-barian or a Girl-barian?""","""Do you want to be a Boy-barian or a Girl-barian?""",“Möchtest du ein Barbarich oder eine Barbarine sein?”,,, +And that inner turmoil about boys and girls and ... fuck! I can't deal with this so I just shrugged it off.,And that inner turmoil about boys and girls and ... fuck! I can't deal with this so I just shrugged it off.,"und das innere Chaos um Jungen und Mädchen und ey, ich will nicht darüber nachdenken, also habe ich einfach mit den Schultern gezuckt.",,, +"""Okay, then roll for Gender!"". He put a d20 in a cup and gave it to me. ""Even for girl, odd for boy and floor is complicated."", he laughed.","""Okay, then roll for Gender!"". He put a d20 in a cup and gave it to me. ""Even for girl, odd for boy and floor is complicated."", he laughed.","“Dann fragen wir die Würfel!” Er nahm einen W20 und gab ihn mir mit Würfelbecher. “Gerade ist Mädchen, ungerade ist Junge, Boden ist kompliziert?”, er kicherte.",,, +"I didn't appreciate that: ""It's in a cup, how is it supposed to hit the floor?""","I didn't appreciate that: ""It's in a cup, how is it supposed to hit the floor?""","Ich schnaubte: “Wie soll es überhaupt auf dem Boden landen, wenn ich mit dem Becher würfle?”",,, +"His tone was still friendly, but suddenly more serious.","His tone was still friendly, but suddenly more serious.","Immer noch freundlich, aber viel ernster antwortete Markus: ",,, +"""I was meaning to ask what result you'd be hoping for so you need to roll blind. But you may also just throw that die at your DM and see what happens.""","""I was meaning to ask what result you'd be hoping for so you need to roll blind. But you may also just throw that die at your DM and see what happens.""","“Nun gut. Ich wollte dich eigentlich fragen, auf was du hoffst und dafür darfst du das Ergebnis halt nicht sehen. Du kannst natürlich auch einfach einen Würfel auf deinen Spielleiter werfen und schauen, was passiert.”",,, +I threw that die at my DM.,I threw that die at my DM.,Ich habe einfach einen Würfel auf meinen Spielleiter geworfen.,,, +"""So, floor it is?""","""So, floor it is?""",“Also doch Boden?”,,, +I ... I couldn't be mad at that.,I ... I couldn't be mad at that.,"Ja nun, das konnte ich so akzeptieren.",,, +"When he then asked me for my name, I just spat out ""Xavier"".","When he then asked me for my name, I just spat out ""Xavier"".","Als er mich dann nach meinem Namen fragte, habe ich Xavier ausgespuckt.",,, +"""Okay, Xavier. And how do we want to name your Barbarian?"" I ... also couldn't be mad at that.","""Okay, Xavier. And how do we want to name your Barbarian?"" I ... also couldn't be mad at that.","“Okay, Xavier. Und wie nennen wir deinen Barbarix?” Ja nun, auch das konnte ich offenbar so akzeptieren.",,, +"Eventually, we settled on Ruby:","Eventually, we settled on Ruby:",Wir haben uns irgendwann auf Ruby geeignet.,,, +a bearded dwarven women with a strong attitude that - unlike most other dwarves - for some reason really doesn't mind being mistaken for a man.,a bearded dwarven women with a strong attitude that - unlike most other dwarves - for some reason really doesn't mind being mistaken for a man.,"Eine sehr reizbare bärtige Zwergin, die - anders als unter Zwerginnen üblich - sich komischerweise gar nicht daran gestört hat, wenn sie für einen Mann gehalten wurde.",,, +"And weirdly ... that was the first ""female"" character I enjoyed playing.","And weirdly ... that was the first ""female"" character I enjoyed playing.","Und irgenfwie war es der erste “Frauen”-Charakter, den ich gern gespielt habe.",,, +Even tho I really didn't want that die to land on girl.,Even tho I really didn't want that die to land on girl.,"Und das, obwohl ich wirklich darauf gehofft hätte, dass der Würfel nicht auf Mädchen landet.",,, +Dirty Dishes,Dirty Dishes,dreckiges Geschirr,,, +"God I am so ""happy"" mom took care of everything at home. The dishes, the laundry, the trash, the groceries, the food.","God I am so ""happy"" mom took care of everything at home. The dishes, the laundry, the trash, the groceries, the food.","Wie “dankbar” ich bin, dass Mom sich früher um alles gekümmert hat. Spülen, wäsche waschen, Müll rausbringen, Einkaufen, Essen kochen.",,, +"But guess what: when you are at university, they don't provide a mom with your dorm.","But guess what: when you are at university, they don't provide a mom with your dorm.","Blöd nur, dass ein Uni-Wohnheim keine Einbau-Muddi hat.",,, +"And suddenly, you don't just need to study for your first semester, you need to learn to survive on your own. Good luck building good habits with that.","And suddenly, you don't just need to study for your first semester, you need to learn to survive on your own. Good luck building good habits with that.","Und dann musst du nicht nur für dein erstes Semester lernen, sondern auch für alleine überleben. Wie soll man da gute Gewohnheiten lernen?",,, +I got really thin.,I got really thin.,Ich wurde irgendwann richtig dünn.,,, +"I didn't really manage to eat at home, I didn't have the money to eat takeout all the time and oh my god:","I didn't really manage to eat at home, I didn't have the money to eat takeout all the time and oh my god:","Ich habs nicht geschafft mir für zuhause Essen zu besorgen, ich hatte nicht genug Geld für dauernd Döner und ich versteh wirklich nicht,",,, +how do students manage to survive in a cafeteria?,how do students manage to survive in a cafeteria?,wie Studis die Mensa überleben.,,, +"I mean: How do they manage to socialise, attend all the lectures, find relationships and even look passable with all that going on?","I mean: How do they manage to socialise, attend all the lectures, find relationships and even look passable with all that going on?","Oder, wie sie dann auch noch Sozialleben, Vorlesungen, Beziehungen und alles hinbekommen, ohne dabei wie Zombies auszusehen.",,, +Is it just me? I don't know.,Is it just me? I don't know.,Oder bin einfach nur ich das Problem? 'weiß nicht.,,, +Who I am glad about tho is Jules. She has an eating order history and someday had enough of seeing my body crumble and decieded to basically adopt me.,Who I am glad about tho is Jules. She has an eating order history and someday had enough of seeing my body crumble and decieded to basically adopt me.,"Ich bin zumindest echt froh über Jules. Sie konnte irgendwann nicht mehr mit ansehen, wie mein Körper zerfällt und hat mich mehr oder weniger adoptiert.",,, +I could never really relate with her former eating discorder thoughts she was probably trying to get out of my head.,I could never really relate with her former eating discorder thoughts she was probably trying to get out of my head.,"Sie hatte große Sorgen, dass ich wie sie eine Essstörung hatte und ehrlich?: So richtig konnte ich ihre ehemaligen Gedanken, die sie mir ausreden wollte, nicht ganz nachfühlen.",,, +But I can't argue against her coping strategies helping my body get the food it needed.,But I can't argue against her coping strategies helping my body get the food it needed.,"Und trotzdem haben ihre Alltags-Hacks echt dabei geholfen, dass mein Körper genug Essen bekommt.",,, +Pile of Paperwork,Pile of Paperwork,Stapel an Papierkram,,, +I don't recognize myself anymore.,I don't recognize myself anymore.,Wer bin ich überhaupt noch? ,,, + I've gotten through Uni in time. And working as a teacher brings me so much joy., I've gotten through Uni in time. And working as a teacher brings me so much joy.,Ich bin doch in Regelzeit durch die Uni gekommen. Und ich habe doch meinen Traumberuf!,,, +The kids love me. My colleagues admire me.,The kids love me. My colleagues admire me.,"Die Kinder lieben mich, das Kollegium bewundert mich!",,, +spending nights and weekends to prepare for my lessons so the quick witted kids are challenged and the other kids don't feel left behind.,spending nights and weekends to prepare for my lessons so the quick witted kids are challenged and the other kids don't feel left behind.,"Und ich kann Nächte und Wochenenden damit verbringen meine Stunden vorzubereiten, damit die schnellen Kids sich nicht langweilen und auch niemand abgehängt wird.",,, +I know the good I do for them.,I know the good I do for them.,"Ich weiß, wie gut ich ihnen tue.",,, +But I just keep falling behind.,But I just keep falling behind.,Aber ich schaff das nicht mehr.,,, +It's bad enough to try to reach parents that just won't show interest in their wonderful kids. But at least I can do the right thing for these kids.,It's bad enough to try to reach parents that just won't show interest in their wonderful kids. But at least I can do the right thing for these kids.,"Ich meine es ist schlimm genug sich mit Eltern zu ärgern, die sich null für ihre wundervollen Kinder interessieren. Aber zumindest kann ich da irgendwie den Kindern helfen.",,, +But dealing with parents that insist every flaw their child has is my mistake? I just can't!,But dealing with parents that insist every flaw their child has is my mistake? I just can't!,"Aber Eltern, die jeden scheiß Fehler von ihrem Kind bei mir suchen? Das geht nicht!",,, +And I am more and more afraid of making mistakes.,And I am more and more afraid of making mistakes.,Und ich habe immer mehr Angst vor Fehlern.,,, +I mean if all the usually good kids have worse grades in my class am I actually doing something wrong with how I teach?,I mean if all the usually good kids have worse grades in my class am I actually doing something wrong with how I teach?,"Ich meine wenn die sonst besten Kinder bei mir immer schlechtere Noten haben, liegt es vielleicht doch an meiner Lehre?",,, +Maybe I shouldn't have them do so many projects and do more tests like everybody else.,Maybe I shouldn't have them do so many projects and do more tests like everybody else.,Vielleicht sind die ganzen Projekte ja doch keine gute Idee und ich sollte einfach wie alle anderen auch mehr Tests schreiben.,,, +If only I could bring myself to start grading...,If only I could bring myself to start grading...,Wenn ich den Scheiß nur korrigeren würde.,,, +I get more and more irritated. And the classroom noise that once brought joy is starting to give me anxiety.,I get more and more irritated. And the classroom noise that once brought joy is starting to give me anxiety.,Aber ich werde einfach nur immer reizbarer. Ich bekomme Panik von dem Toben und Lachen der Kinder obwohl ich doch genau das lieben möchte.,,, +I can't even bring myself to reply to Jules anymore because I know I'm losing weight again and I can't have her be worried about me.,I can't even bring myself to reply to Jules anymore because I know I'm losing weight again and I can't have her be worried about me.,"Und ich schaffe es nicht einmal mehr auf Jules zu antworten, weil ich weiß ich habe wieder abgenommen und sie kann sich doch nicht schon wieder Sorgen um mich machen.",,, +She deserves to see the best version of myself. So do the kids.,She deserves to see the best version of myself. So do the kids.,Sie verdient es mich in voller Blüte zu sehen; meine Klasse auch!,,, +And I know all of this will get better if I just pull myself together.,And I know all of this will get better if I just pull myself together.,"Und ich weiß das wird besser, wenn ich mich zusammen reiße.",,, +Just breathe and work. I have chosen the right path through life.,Just breathe and work. I have chosen the right path through life.,Atmen und arbeiten. Ich habe die richtigen Entscheidungen getroffen.,,, +I must be okay.,I must be okay.,Mir muss es gut gehen.,,, +Doctors Note,Doctors Note,Arztbrief,,, +In hindsight I don't know if going to uni was the right decision.,In hindsight I don't know if going to uni was the right decision.,"Inzwischen bin ich mir nicht sicher, ob Uni wirklich die richtige Entscheidung war.",,, +I doubt many professors would recommend me to come again.,I doubt many professors would recommend me to come again.,Ich weiß meine Profs würden es mir nicht nochmal empfehlen.,,, +"Me, the lazy student that just lacks the discipline to come to their lectures and do their assignments and learn for their exams.","Me, the lazy student that just lacks the discipline to come to their lectures and do their assignments and learn for their exams.","Wer will schon so ein faules Studi haben, dem die Disziplin für Vorlesungen besuchen, Hausaufgaben erledigen und für Prüfungen lernen gänzlich fehlt.",,, +"Sorry prof, I wanted to come but there was no class for me. ","Sorry prof, I wanted to come but there was no class for me. ","Herr von und zu Prof, ich wäre ja gern gekommen, aber es gab keine Veranstaltungen für mich.",,, +"I didn't sign up to study math, biology and art history. I came here to study education.","I didn't sign up to study math, biology and art history. I came here to study education.","Weil ich habe mich nicht für Mathe, Biologie und Kunstgeschichte eingeschrieben, sondern für Lehramt.",,, +And my dear Mr. Professor:,And my dear Mr. Professor:,Und mein lieber Prof:,,, +"seeing your lacklustre lectures, I don't think there's much I can learn from you.","seeing your lacklustre lectures, I don't think there's much I can learn from you.","wenn ich mir ihre Foliensätze so ansehe, glaube ich nichti Sie können oder wollen mir viel von Didaktik erzählen.",,, +"So, rather than wasting my time on advanced algebra, I spend it on the student council to organize support I would have needed but didn't get.","So, rather than wasting my time on advanced algebra, I spend it on the student council to organize support I would have needed but didn't get.","Also statt meine Zeit mit Algebra zu verschwenden, habe ich im Fachschaftsrat die Unterstützung für Andere organisiert, die mir selbst immer gefehlt hatte.",,, +I have never worked or learned so much in my entire life.,I have never worked or learned so much in my entire life.,Und ich hab noch nie in meinem Leben so viel geschafft oder gelernt.,,, +This is also where I got diagnosed by peer review.,This is also where I got diagnosed by peer review.,Da habe ich auch meine Diagnose per Peer-Review erhalten.,,, +Who would have guessed that creating a social activity without alcohol or noise would attract all the neurodivergent students.,Who would have guessed that creating a social activity without alcohol or noise would attract all the neurodivergent students?,"Wer hätte gedacht, dass ich mit der Orga einer sozialen Aktivität ohne Alkohol und Lärm so viele neurodivergente Studis kennen lernen würde?",,, +This is also why I would maybe still do it all over again:,This is also why I would maybe still do it all over again:,Und dafür würde ich es alles auch nochmal machen.,,, +Because these beautiful people very probably saved my life by not giving up on me and helping me get professional help.,Because these beautiful people very probably saved my life by not giving up on me and helping me get professional help.,"Zumal mir diese wundervollen Menschlis auch vermutlich das Leben gerettt haben, weil sie mir geholfen haben, professionelle Hilfe zu bekommen.",,, +"My therapist was somewhat old-fashioned and I got to learn from experience why deep psychology isn't recommended for autism or ADHD,","My therapist was somewhat old-fashioned and I got to learn from experience why deep psychology isn't recommended for autism or ADHD,","Gut, meine Therapeuthin war etwas altmodisch und hat ganz gut demonstriert, warum Tiefenpsychologie bei ADHS und Auti nicht im Leitfaden steht.",,, +but she didn't think I had that anyway.,but she didn't think I had that anyway.,"Aber naja, sie meinte ich hätte das ja eh nicht.",,, +"So we talked a lot about my depression, my sense of self and how it evolved from my past.","So we talked a lot about my depression, my sense of self and how it evolved from my past.","Also haben wir über meine Depression geredet, über mein Selbstbild und, wie das aus meiner Vergangenheit entstanden ist.",,, +She was a very good listener and had a gift for putting her finger on hurtful thoughts.,She was a very good listener and had a gift for putting her finger on hurtful thoughts.,Sie konnte auch sehr gut zuhöhren und hatte ein großartiges Talent dafür den Finger immer genau in die Wunde zu legen.,,, +"She was never gentle in doing that, but she was right about one thing:","She was never gentle in doing that, but she was right about one thing:","Sie war nie besonders sanft dabei, aber in einer Sache hatte sie wirklich Recht:",,, +"Old thoughts are here to stay, but they can be rearranged.","Old thoughts are here to stay, but they can be rearranged.","Alte Gedanken gehen nicht einfach weg, aber man kann sie neu sortieren.",,, +I sometimes wish I could go back in time to save myself from Lukas.,I sometimes wish I could go back in time to save myself from Lukas.,"Manchmal würde ich gern in der Zeit zurückreisen, um mich vor Lukas zu retten.",,, +Sometimes I even want to fight him one last time to make him feel how much he hurt me.,Sometimes I even want to fight him one last time to make him feel how much he hurt me.,"Manchmal will ich auch einfach noch einmal mit ihm kämpfen, damit er fühlen muss, wie sehr er mir weh getan hat.",,, +"I don't like these thoughts, because all they do is make my head spiral into an endless void of anger and doubt.","I don't like these thoughts, because all they do is make my head spiral into an endless void of anger and doubt.","Ich mag diese Gedanken nicht, weil sie nichts als Spiralen voller Wut und Selbstzweifel schaffen.",,, +"So on a calm mind, I just hope he learned his lesson so his next love doesn't need to become a survivor.","So on a calm mind, I just hope he learned his lesson so his next love doesn't need to become a survivor.","Mit einem klaren Kopf also wünsche ich mir vor allem, dass er daraus gelernt hat, damit seine nächste Liebe nicht den gleichen Scheiß überleben muss.",,, +But do I regret being one?,But do I regret being one?,Aber bereue ich meinen Scheiß?,,, +I mean it has made me go to therapy and that was a good thing.,I mean it has made me go to therapy and that was a good thing.,Ich meine ich hab deswegen Therapie genommen und das war gut.,,, +My therapist was pretty young and still in training.,My therapist was pretty young and still in training.,"Mein Therapeut war zwar sehr jung und noch in der Ausbildung,",,, +Talking to *him* about sex never really worked for me.,Talking to *him* about sex never really worked for me.,also habe ich mit *ihm* nie wirklich über Sex reden können.,,, +So I still don't know what to do about my cravings. I'd rather not have them but I can't deny they exist.,So I still don't know what to do about my cravings. I'd rather not have them but I can't deny they exist.,Was ich also mit meinen Bedürfnissen anfangen soll? Sie sind halt da und ich will sie nicht wirklich haben.,,, +At least he gave me the tools to figure it out on my own.,At least he gave me the tools to figure it out on my own.,"Zumindest hat er mir gezeigt, wie ich das später selbst klären kann.",,, +"Old thoughts are here to stay, he always said. But you can choose how to react.","Old thoughts are here to stay, he always said. But you can choose how to react.","Alte Gedanken gehen nicht weg davon, dass man sie ignoriert, sagt er gern. Aber man kann sich entscheiden, wie man auf sie reagiert.",,, +"And while I choose to not react to my cravings for now, I can choose something different in the future.","And while I choose to not react to my cravings for now, I can choose something different in the future.","Also entscheide ich mich, dass ich erstmal nicht auf diese Bedürfnisse reagiere und weiß ich kann mich später umentscheiden.",,, +He also helped me manage the gauntlet that is an ADHD diagnosis. I suspect I wouldn't have the executive skills to get that on my own.,He also helped me manage the gauntlet that is an ADHD diagnosis. I suspect I wouldn't have the executive skills to get that on my own.,Und er hat mir auf dem steinigen Weg zu einer ADHS-Diagnose geholfen. Ich glaube nicht ich hätte das alleine organisiert bekommen.,,, +So I guess I got my medication thanks to Lukas?,So I guess I got my medication thanks to Lukas?,Also habe ich Lukas indierekt meine Medis zu verdanken?,,, +And I can tell when to brace for my period because the weird urge to make my ex hit some very hard ground is quite specific.,And I can tell when to brace for my period because the weird urge to make my ex hit some very hard ground is quite specific.,"Naja und ich weiß, wann ich mich auf meine Periode einstellen sollte: Denn dieses Bedürfnis, dass ich meinen Ex mit einem sehr hartem Boden bekannt machen möchte, ist praktischerweise sehr spezifisch für mein PMS.",,, diff --git a/src/internationalisation.de.translation b/src/internationalisation.de.translation index 58a4b60f64016c09a216d16eecd1769372f0e990..729e980640fbd93fb6758b9a809c29b33a715247 100644 GIT binary patch delta 17145 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